Church of the SubGenius Hour of Slack #1279 - XXX-Rated SubGirl-Dominated Internet-Only 13X-Day Special
I dunno WHAT we’re gonna send the broadcast stations this week — maybe a rerun — because there’s no way any of the tracks of this episode would make sense if they were censored into being safe for broadcast in the U.S.A. It’s all the best bits from 13X-Day Drill that were just too raunchy, philosophically offensive or just plain fucked up to even consider for prime time. Dr. Legume’s legendary tale of rapine, which inspired several Church schizms and meme abuses, starts it off. We hear some blistering, wallpaper-peeling rants from several of the sweet little ladies of the Church, including the sailor-mouthed Priestess Pisces, Rev. Susie the Floozie, Popess Pantiara Evokavitch, Rev. Pockets, and Priestess Enshrina. Ministry of Slack is represented with a great sermon by Rev. Sweetness McGee. Rev. Angry Larry tears reality a surrealistic new asshole, and Rev. Panik ends the show with a bizarre a capella torch-blues-Elvisoid original SubGenius song. An epic spazz doktor duet with DJ Shaver and Pisces, “DIE MOTHERFUCKER DIE,” with Many-Fisted Tails of Connie, is interspersed amongst the shouted word performances.
“Today is 23 October, the date that James Ussher, Church of Ireland Archbishop of Armagh and Primate of All Ireland, determined to be the very first day of creation in 4004 BCE. That makes the world 6013 years old today, in his chronology (if you’re adding it up at home, remember that there is no year 0)”—PZ Myers.
Church of the SubGenius Hour of Slack #1278 - Leftovers of Involuntary Slack
This episode has a little bit of everything: new music and old (DEVO, Rudy Schwartz Project, Jonathan Coulton, Many Fisted Tails of Connie and St. N and Helena Handbasket), a zillion new collages by Fernandinande LeMur, and bits from unheard SubGenius radio: Dr. Sinister’s RADIO SYNESTHESIA, old ESO Swamp Radio with Lonesome Cowboy Dave, 13X-Day live radio with Dr. Philo Drummond, Dr. Hal, Rev. Susie the Floozie and Rev. Ivan Stang. And then there’s also a mess of other weird stuff.
“Please be aware that any images of Stonehenge can not be used for any commercial interest, all commercial interest to sell images must be directed to English Heritage.”—English Heritage, making up laws.
Obviously, you don’t ask the Tories how they can do this. They, streetfighters of long-standing, the current vogue for simpering head-boy bonhomie notwithstanding, are clear about their aims, interests and concomitant attacks.
Nor is this message addressed to Vince Cable or the wolf-eyed replicant Clegg. Whatever theatrics of choicelessness and discomfort the former occasionally insuates, he, good Orange Booker, knows just what he’s up to. And the latter dispenses even with the mummery.
But you - you’re one of those Liberal Democrats who take seriously a commitment to some kind of progressive agenda. You’re another thing. One doesn’t have to share all your politics to believe you sincere. So it has to be asked of you: WTF?
When it’s obvious that there are other ways of saving money that don’t punish the poor, are you happy with what you’re doing?
When the entire agenda about the necessity of the cuts is not only an invention, but a not-very-convincing one, is it mere economic illiteracy that keeps you quiescent?
When it’s not just radical, but eminently mainstream, even neoliberaleconomists who are stressing that if your aim is to reestablish the British economy this is economic gibberish, are you comfortable?
Sure, some Tories are fucking idiots - but a lot aren’t. They know that these measures, far from salvaging it, might might very well break the economy. And that is, for them, a risk worth taking, because either way, something is gained: a transfer of power, the finishing of the Thatcherite revolution, a recomposition of class strength. And if the cost of that is mass immiseration, and even the stagnation of the national economy, so be it.
So the question for you is, just how comfortable are you being complicit with baying class thuggery?
What are you getting out of this? How many pieces of silver? It profiteth a person nothing if they exchange their immortal soul for the world, but for - what? Minister of State for Children and Families? The same ones you’re taking money from?
And even if you follow the Auton Lothario of Sheffield Hallam in thinking that morals are for mortals, that concern at the antidemocratic imposition of an agenda the vast majority of those who voted for you would be appalled at is quaint, there’s also the question of strategy. If kneecapping the welfare state does not, in fact, prod the sclerotic economy into anything approaching life (and why should it?), then the LibDems - you - are finished. You face annihilation.
Even cynically, is it worth it? To be treated, for two terms, minimum, as the scum of British politics? The most craven power-licking integrity-less liars of Parliament? Not even Tories but Tory-enablers? Do you honestly think that the majority of the electorate who supported you (in deeply misguided protest) would be willing to give you their vote again? Unless it was to shit on it, put it in a paper-bag, set fire to it and post it through your door?
Would you not feel better being able to sleep at night? Where’s your line in the sand?