A collection of stuff, things, nonsense, rants, raves, pretties, sillies, and gee-gaws from Rev. Hugo Nebula, Ordained Minister of the Church of the SubGenius.
(And boobs. Sometimes there are boobs. Just like in real life.)
Thank you for reading.
“A hypothetical intelligent tapeworm might well consider itself blessed to have such a warm and comforting environment, that gives it all the food it needs and takes away anything that it excretes. And if it were of a philosophical bent, it might speculate: what is the extent of my environment? Is it infinite, or are there physical limits to it? And, eventually, are there other tapeworms out there? And finally, the brilliant polymath-level Enrico Fermi of tapeworms might ask, if there are other tapeworms, why aren’t they here?”
“Now for the first time, Nocebo is available for sale direct to the general public! Despite containing no active ingredients whatsoever, Nocebo can cause a wide range of undesirable effects, from nausea to diarrhea, that is because it’s potency lies entirely inside the human brain! Nocebo merely suggests that it is bad for you, your brain and body does the rest!
“Try Nocebo today! You’ll almost certainly regret it.”
“I just spent 8 minutes sweating, rocking back and forth and hyperventilating while shitting. I thought it was death. At 36 I have never experienced anything like it. It kept getting worse and worse until finally my ass let loose with the fury of a thousand suns. Then, aside from a burning asshole, it has subsided. I am still sitting here waiting for something more. I think it’s done.”
“In another sexually charged example of performance art Davis sets out to correct what he feels is a case of censorship in scientists’ efforts to communicate with extraterrestrials. He explains that researchers have sent images of an anatomically correct man into outer space but the image they sent of a woman lacked genitalia. To right this wrong, Davis transmitted the sound of vaginal contractions of ballet dancers to several nearby stars. The audio recording was beamed from MIT’s Millstone Hill radar for several minutes before the United States Air Force shut him down.”
A corrosion cast of blood vessels in the brain made from resin is displayed at the Wellcome trusts new ‘Brains’ exhibition at the Wellcome Collection on March 27, 2012 in London, England. Photo by Dan Kitwood/Getty Images.
“UC San Francisco pediatric endocrinologist Robert Lustig… says that added sweeteners have health effects comparable to alcohol and tobacco, and should be regulated accordingly. In a comment piece for the journal Nature, Lustig and his colleagues argue that the state should selectively block access to sugar…”
“We all know ants are incredibly capable creatures. They live in vast, interconnected colonies, can lift several times their own body weight, and coordinate their activity with incredible precision.
“But many of the things that make ants impressive would also make them formidable foes. Perhaps it’s time we took a look at some of these strengths in greater detail. Remember: it’s important to know your enemy - erm, I mean your new insect overlords…”