A collection of stuff, things, nonsense, rants, raves, pretties, sillies, and gee-gaws from Rev. Hugo Nebula, Ordained Minister of the Church of the SubGenius. (And boobs. Sometimes there are boobs. Just like in real life.) Thank you for reading.




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Posts tagged "george r r martin"

"She woke with a gasp, not knowing who she was, or where.

"The smell of blood was heavy in her nostrils… or was that her nightmare, lingering? She had dreamed of wolves again, of running through some dark pine forest with a great pack at her hells, hard on the scent of prey.

"Half-light filled the room, grey and gloomy. Shivering, she sat up in bed and ran a hand across her scalp. Stubble bristled against her palm. I need to shave before Izembaro sees. Mercy, I’m Mercy, and tonight I’ll be raped and murdered. Her true name was Mercedene, but Mercy was all anyone ever called her…”

"Are you reading A Song of Ice and Fire for the first time? Have you heard that volumes four and five, A Feast for Crows and A Dance with Dragons, cover the same time period but split up the characters, so that most of the people who appear in Feast don’t show up in Dance and vice versa? Do you think you’ll be one of the people that finds this really frustrating? (I’m not, I was perfectly happy with the books as-is and recommend them as such, but I know y’all are out there.) Are you interested in recombining the two halves of the story in hopes that it’ll make for a more satisfying reading experience? Here’s how you do it!

"To combine A Feast for Crows and A Dance with Dragons into one giant megabook, keeping almost everything in order both within the timeline of the story and in the chapter order that author George R.R. Martin intended, use the chapter list below…”

"The Dance of the Dragons is the flowery name bestowed upon the savage internecine struggle for the Iron Throne of Westeros fought between two rival branches of House Targaryen during the years 129 to 131 AC. To characterize the dark, turbulent, bloody doings of this period as a “dance” strikes us as grotesquely inappropriate. No doubt the phrase originated with some singer. “The Dying of the Dragons” would be altogether more fitting, but tradition and time have burned the more poetic usage into the pages of history, so we must dance along with the rest…"

(via Dangerous Women: “The Princess and The Queen, or, The Blacks and The Greens” (Excerpt) by George R. R. Martin |

Because George R R Martin doesn’t have anything else to occupy his time at the moment.

"A handmade personal plush inspired by the saddest character In the Game of Thrones series. Jon Snow the bastard son of House Stark and his trusty Direwolf ‘Ghost’.

"This lonely plush doll comes with his own Valyrian steel sword ‘Longclaw’. Ghost comes with his very own White Walker hand which he found out past the wall in the snowy snow."

On the morning that she left the Water Gardens, her father rose from his chair to kiss her on both cheeks.  “The fate of Dorne goes with you, daughter,” he said, as he pressed the parchment into her hand.  “Go swiftly, go safely, be my eyes and ears and voice… but most of all, take care.”
      “I will, Father.”  She did not shed a tear.  Arianne Martell was a princess of Dorne, and Dornishmen did not waste water lightly.  It was a near thing, though.  It was not her father’s kisses nor his hoarse words that made her eyes glisten, but the effort that brought him to his feet, his legs trembling under him, his joints swollen and inflamed with gout.  Standing was an act of love.  Standing was an act of faith.  
      He believes in me.  I will not fail him.

Click through to read the whole excerpt. Yes, I know it’s fucking Dorne, but it’s at least something…

A Dance with Dragons (A Song of Ice and Fire, #5)A Dance with Dragons by George R.R. Martin
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

A (mostly) fine return to form for this series after the almost entirely redundant A Feast For Crows, which is looking more and more like a publisher-pleasing stopgap rather than a valid entry in the series. Still, this is not without flaws: Tyrion spends most of this book stuck on a boat, and - while it’s interesting to see him function without his usual weapons of wit and cunning - this means that he contributes very little to the overall plot; Daenerys also treads water in this book, dithering more than acting, and having both her and Tyrion removed as proactive characters gives this book an unfocused edge that doesn’t quite work for me.

If you wanted to catch up on Brienne and Jaime and Lady Stoneheart (which I’ve been waiting for since Book III a hundred years ago), you’re out of luck. Jon Snow’s story remains as the one in which most of this instalment’s joys are to be found, and seems to set the scene for the next book, as do the once irrelevant-seeming adventures of Arya, whose role in the rest of the story becomes clearer.

So, not without some of the flaws which A Feast For Crows introduced into the series, but certainly enough to reignite the love and enthusiasm I had for these book so many years ago. Actually can’t wait for The Winds of Winter - well done, George.

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Game of Thrones Season 2: A Clash of Kings Blu-ray cover.

A Feast for CrowsA Feast for Crows by George R.R. Martin
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

After the breakneck speed, complexity and solid characterisation of the previous three volumes, A Feast For Crows stumbles at almost every hurdle. In fairness, most of these hurdles are of Martin’s own creation, and most of them were avoidable.

I don’t know a single reader of this series who doesn’t list either Jon Snow, Tyrion or Daenarys as their favourite character, and their absence here leaves a gaping hole; Cersei, Jaime and Brienne make for poor substitutes, and the new characters introduced (along with yet more storylines!) only serve to accentuate the deficiency.

Personally, I’d have been happier for this to have told the congruent stories along with A Dance With Dragons (which I have yet to read) and end on a cliffhanger. The finale of this book seems very limp compared to the flurry of twists and revelations that ended A Storm of Swords. Another fault in Martin’s storytelling decision is that we hear offhand of the deaths of at least one viewpoint character, and have to read hundreds of pages to, I hope, find out the details, and whether this fate is true.

I think the validity of this book’s plot will be tested in the inevitable TV version; I simply can’t imagine HBO spending millions on the dull ‘adventures’ of Cersei, Jamie and Brienne - their stories will be severely abbreviated and folded into the - fingers crossed - much more relevant and interesting tales of Tyrion, Dany and Jon. But I’m not going to read that now, because this book has put me off the series more than anything, so I’m going to read something shorter and more interesting.

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"I can happily imagine a world in which A Song of Ice and Fire simply keeps on going, like the little engine that could. I can imagine a world in which Brandon Sanderson endlessly continues the story of these kings, queens, knights and soldiers well into the 22nd century or as long as there’s money to be made, whichever ends first. A world in which the children of Jon or Tyrion or whoever’s still alive continue to conspire and fight and think pointed thoughts in italics, where the new banner of the Lannisters simply asks “Where do whores go?” and it takes five chapters for someone just to go to the toilets.”

"Kickstarter - Help Daenerys Targaryen buy a ship, sail to Westeros and reclaim the Iron Throne."