THE PREPOSTEROUS BOLLOX OF THE SITUATION

A collection of stuff, things, nonsense, rants, raves, pretties, sillies, and gee-gaws from Rev. Hugo Nebula, Ordained Minister of the Church of the SubGenius. (And boobs. Sometimes there are boobs. Just like in real life.) Thank you for reading.
 

 

 

 

 
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Posts tagged "hour of slack"
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We’re using up some of the nifty but heretofore unplayed location recordings made at 16X-Day and Starwood last year. There are parts of Rev. Stang’s Starwood 34 sermon — mostly the parts where he read rants by others (such as Onan Canobite), and some “documentary” material recorded at the giant bonfire. Some funny on-and-offstage moments prompted by the rainstorms of 16X-Day are played, even though they might help keep attendance down. We hear two rants by Dr. G. Gordon Gordon, three Amino Acids tunes and one Psycho “Skeletoon.” Then, Lonesome Cowboy Dave calls in, and you can probably guess what happens. IF YOU ARE MENTALLY ILL, THAT IS! 

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This is the pretty much uncut second hour of the first day of 16X-Day Drill daytime stage recordings. Until the end, it’s mostly just Dr. Hal Robins and Rev. Ivan Stang having a conversation. (We are joined by the SubGenius Women’s Auxiliary next week.) Subjects discussed: “Bob” beer koozy condoms. The Human Millipede. There’s a beehive in my nutsac. Why we have a bloody tablecloth on stage. The travails of preemie Naked Mole Rats born on an iceberg in a snowstorm. Don’t make desert tortoises pee! Toad zit juice and lizard spit as medicines. Rape isn’t funny except when we attempt it. “Bob” porn and photos of the real “Bob.” True Smiths and False Smi. Religion is good if only for getting rid of witches. The 3 Stooges brand Snake Oil. Mexican Laurel and Hardy. Google Glasses. Santa bills us. Krampus and Little Black Peter. God as played by Morgan Freeman and Pappy Stang. The Smith Family Reunion. Rod Serling, SubGenius. The Great Secret: Judy in Disguise by John Fred and His Playboy Band

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Dr. Hal joined Stang, Doe, Dr. Sinister & Lonesome Cowboy Dave for one last broadcast show at WCSB Cleveland before 16X-Day, but then they talked about almost everything but X-Day, and in an unusually lively manner. Subjects include: Blown blue whales. The Moreau Option and maleable genetics. Monsterdome in Texas. Cowboy outlaw honcho cheroot spouting! The upside-saddle. The Bizarro SubGenius World. ACTUAL PHOTO OF “BOB”!! COSMIC DOBBSTOWN X-DAY RANT. Feral babies in Cleveland sewers. The Declension, the Clenched Fist, and The Rulership. Third Nostril boogers and baby devils or imps. Gran-mal paranoia. Giant Women Movies. We are mere hours from The End - Recess. At the beginning: collages mostly from the early SubGenius Media Barrages and alt.binaries.slack (by Stang, Werner, Drummond, Hambone, LeMur etc.); a fine collage by Rev. Susie the Floozie closes things.

This quintet of yakkers went on that night for another two hours of radio on Dr. Sinister’s show, Radio Synaesthesia. Clips from that will probably be rerun here later, but not necessarily in sequence.

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Dr. Hal and Rev. Stang returned from the rugged and muddy X-Day campground to Cleveland’s WCSB just in time to razz Lonesome Cowboy Dave, Dr. Sinister and all seven listeners about everything they missed by not camping in the rain this year. They actually missed a lot, and our sympathies go out to all like them. We are running this breathless immediate report first, but it will be followed by the pre-and-post X-Day “2013” recordings, more or less chronologically, for probably the next 20 Hours of Slack. This year’s unique physical challenges probably generated some of the best moments that were captured. Luckily, the location and soundboard recordings all sound great, which almost makes up for the world NOT ENDING, GOD DAMN IT! Oh well. Back to the old drawing and quartering board.

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And it’s a rerun, a real oldie. Hour of Slack #535. It’s WHAT WILL HAPPEN ON X-DAY, in excruciating detail. It features what may well be the most forceful (and informative!) rants ever delivered by both Rev. Ivan Stang and Dr. K’taden Legume, sermons recorded in moments when those worthies were totally caught up in the thrall of “Bob” — divine messengers, as it were, helpless to do anything but preach the hardest truths of SubGenius Orthodox Dobbsian doctrine. Punctuating these heart-staking sermons are some of the most intensive so-called “Media Barrage tapes” from the 1980s, especially segments from St. Byron Werner’s historic cassette collage masterpieces “Space Age Bachelor Pad” (the actual origin of that hipster genre catch-phrase) and “Dougs, Drugs and Doctors.” Voices heard from the old SubGenius Media Barrage tapes include Dr. Philo Drummond, Hellswami Satellite Weavers (the great SubGenius “ur-illustrator” narrating into a tape deck on a drive through Meteor Crater, Arizona), Former Pastor Buck Naked, Dobbs’ bodyguard Dr. G. Gordon Gordon, Pope Michael Flores and even Janor, back in the olden days. We should have been running this episode annually, and would do so henceforth, were not X-Day imminently nigh.

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It’s a great episode of “Bob’s” Slacktime Fun House from WREK-Atlanta, and it’s the kind of incredible collage tour-de-force that we’re all coming to expect, and hear, from Rev. Susie the Floozie. Is there such thing as coming too hard to hear something? FIND OUT FOR YOURSELF with this astounding collision of everything end-of-the-world and UFO, badsongs especially. You’ll also hear some classic snake-oil selling and UFO-contactee blithering. It’s like the whole “New Age” packed into one hour. You’ll puke with joy at how stupid humans show themselves to be! — even when compared to SubGeniuses.

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MAYBE we’ll use up the Ask Dr. Hal radio show recordings from our visit to San Francisco last winter, BEFORE Dr. Hal comes to Ohio for X-Day and we record dozens of NEW shows’ worth of material. The stretches of ADH used herein involve special guests Stang, Philo Drummond, St. Palmer Vreedeez of LIES Foundation, Puzzling Evidence, Pete Goldy and K-ROB. It’s all seasoned with many new Lemur collages, two new (mind-blowing) Rudy Schwartz Project songs and one old one done with Stang, now heavily revised — and, for the first time, explained. As usual with Dr. Hal shows, monster movie and comic book trivia vies with Dobbs and SubGenius trivia. Listeners are also privvy to a location recording in which Rev. Stang’s desert hikes begin to mingle in his mind with his favorite video game, Monster Hunter.

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X-Day is coming, so a great “Planet X vs. Classic X-Day Songs” opening assembled itself from songs by King of Slack Bill T. Miller, ESO, The Kirkendahl Void, and The Mondo Retardo Band (Lonesome Cowboy Dave) — combined with sacred movie dialog clips regarding MONSTER ZERO, selected by Mister Sister. But after that had been played, and the “ON AIR” light went on, and Lonesome Cowboy Dave called in, we proceeded to go off on miriad tangents and didn’t talk about X-Day much at all. Dave took advantage of an unusual technical problem in the studio, an inadvertent reverb caused by the phone line inexplicably staying loud on preview speakers that are supposed to automatically shut off whenever the mics are live. After failing to defeat it, we rode the glitch. Government monitoring of private communication is discussed (but probably not even monitored). A few items of gossip heretofore kept secret regarding upcoming future SubGenius events are leaked, mainly concerning Pittsburgh Devival June 22 and X-Day/Starwood the first two weeks of July. THEN it gets WEIRD.

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With our new ElectroHypnoMentalephone, we can’t go wrong in ANY KIND of Show production! Music by Fishbone, The Sultans of Ping, and The Rudy Schwartz Project; AMAZING new collage bits from The Large. All the rest is from the Ask Dr. Hal Show from Radio Valencia in San Francisco, a Feb. 22 episode with Rev. Ivan Stang as guest. Philo, Puz, and Vreedeez were also in the studio, but distracted by their drone-stalking of bystanders on the streets outside the studio. Their contributions came later in Hal’s show, which will be heard on future Hours of Slack. In the meantime, unfortunately: THIS.

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This episode isn’t ONLY about the SubGenius Video Game, but that project is discussed in detail on a recent Puzzling Evidence show. We play more new songs by The Rudy Schwartz Project and an El Queso oldie, some new/old collages, and much live chatter by StangDoe in the studio and Lonesome Cowboy Dave phoning it in, as it were. (His BUZZ is GONE!) We had no idea what we were going to talk about going in, and we ended up disecting the movie Upstream Color, the new “Bob” Hates Pinks movement, sex trends at X-Day Drills, rival cults, and scaly-legged hippie lizards. Stang reads a bit from THE PSYCHLOPAEDIA OF SLACK.

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 The Rudy Schwatrtz Project has a new album in distribution, Full Frontal Klugman, and we premiere here three golden tracks (including a cover of SLC’s “Pick A Booger”) plus a SubGeniusly special promo. Much of the rest of the show, interspersed with LeMur barrage and other chunks, is from the February 22 Puzzling Evidence Show recorded at KPFA, Berkeley, when Wei and I, Stang were visiting. (Dr. Drummond was engaged in an important medical experiment that night/morning.) Subject matters include the “Bob” department store chain, the SubGenius video game and abusement park, and speculation about who would win — Hitler or Jesus? A Psycho Skeletons cover of a Nirvana song closes the show.

It’s a good thing that our contributors spend so much time crafting their segments. We at Tarzan’s Radio Studio in Cleveland Heights, where Hour of Slack is assembled, must perforce swing hurriedly from show production to show production; for instance, the credits for this were recorded “on the run” in the Slackermansion bathroom.

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For those who grew up in the 1950s and 1960s, the late Jonathan Winters was THE sick weirdo comedian. (We were too young for Lenny Bruce, and The Goon Show was only in England.) For many of us in the USA, Winters was our first exposure to true improvisation and stream-of-consciousness surrealism. So, Winters’ recent death was my excuse to a) file an extension on my taxes and b) cram all of my Rare Winters collection into one show. Except for short calls from TWO Daves (!), the whole show is Winters performing, not on stage or TV, but for his friends. Much of it is out-takes from recording sessions for commercials, some of it is phone messages left by Winters to his agent Jim Smith. We know that younger folks think of Jonathan Winters as that fat guy who played grandpas in sitcoms, but long before that he was planting seeds of Slack through Insanity into the brains of young mutants. Incidentally, we could make another whole Hour of Slack out of JUST Winters talking about UFOs, one of his favorite subjects. But we won’t.

The Internet-only version of this show has an extra 6 minutes at the end — Winters doing some racially based humor that we suspect wouldn’t be properly understood in context by some radio listeners.

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Upon our return to the Cleveland Heights Slackermansion after a four month road trip, we did an old-fashioned live show at WCSB with collages, music, Puzzling Evidence clips and the buzz that sometimes comes when Lonesome Cowboy Dave calls in. We plan to buy Dave a cell phone. Collages this time are mostly by Rev. Baby Bear. Songs by The Rudy Schwartz Project and Jonathan Coulton. Background music by Cult of Zir and The Psycho Skeletons. Subjects covered include: Desert Hiking Hints. We Need a New iEverything. Things that Novelty Dinosaurs are Made Of. Pest Western and the Roach Motels of America. Forbidden Geology and the New Names for Crazy Rock Formations. Rain in Death Valley and tortoises who pee themselves to death.

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Herein we present the last hour of the Ask Dr. Hal Show of 2-15-2013. It opens with an exceedingly, perhaps even painfully in-depth disection of the movie SON OF KONG, the actual fate of Skull Island, and very large butts (hence the JoCo cover of “Baby Got Back”). Other topics covered: eating frogs; Bobbies and X-Day; Zappa sucks; Hose vs. Hos and HoS; Winterstar and Prof. Chas Smith; giant pills; drugs and listeners; Radio Carpal Tunnel; Manopause; Jack Kirby comic book monsters and their underpants; kindergarten meth heads; Kona, Monarch of Monster Isle; demigods of X-Day; hiding from reality.