THE PREPOSTEROUS BOLLOX OF THE SITUATION
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Mila Kunis photographed by Craig McDean
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Carey Mulligan: Carey, Carey, Quite Contrary - W by Michael Thompson, January 2012
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Mila Kunis by Ruven Afanador
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He said Star Trek is too “philosophical”? Screw that noise.
I don’t...
Night Before X-Day is always fraught with insanity, creativity and also inebriation. This episode is composed primarily of that selfsame totally Dobbs-inspired, trance-spouted ranting, jams and songs, all delivered from the main stage at Wisteria. Ranters, musicians and bullshitters include ancient co-founding Hierarch Dr. G. Gordon Gordon, nerd beauty queen Popess Pantiara Evokavitch, mighty shemergentile Priestess Pisces, driven guitar maestro Rev. Angry Larry of The Amino Acids, evil genius Rev. “Suds” Pshaw, sex goddess Rev. Pockets of Ministry of Slack, wise man/retard Rev. D. Lister, and occasionally the resigned Rev. Stang. Bishop Stick on bass throughout. Dobbs-frying gospel hymns by the devoesque bulldada blueweed band The Mutant Mountain Boys bracket the show. This one is also marked by the return of the authentic PR Gnus by Mr. Fernandinande LeMur, and believe it or not, a brief resurrection at 15X-Day by the late King of Rock and Roll, performing a SubGenius version of the classic song “My Way.”
We had so hoped that we wouldn’t have to produce this particular show; we had hoped that our Pleasure Robots and Sex Goddesses would edit it for us. Much of this show was recorded (on a video camera operated by Stang) on the last day of the 14 X-Day Drill, the morning when we awaited the Saucers from Planet X and once again got shafted instead of beamed up in a shaft of light. Various songs and other live Hour of Slack business from the Wisteria stage build up to the recordings of the Moment of Truth, which had to be edited considerably for the broadcast version. This Internet version, however, is not only uncut but has a bonus extra 9 minutes of blather and palaver from the participants as we all tried to work out why the aliens keep NOT Rupturing us up to our promised Escape Vessels. Considering that this was the 14th time we’ve been let down, and technically the 16th year we’ve Drilled, the gathered SubGeniuses were pretty good sports about it. The louder participants include Dr. K’taden Legume, Dr. Hal, Papa Joe Mama, Princess Wei, and Rev. Susie the Floozie. Incidentally, this whole Drill was shot in 3D by a documentary crew, although their project is about SubGenius in general rather than just this festival.
After 16 shows derived from 14X-Day recordings, next week is our Traditional Xistlessnessmess Rerun, and then we move on to Starwood, a very different festival held in the very same place.
Photo & Text Report on 14X-Day Drill
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Church of the SubGenius Hour of Slack #1310 — May 21 End of the World Special (live 5-22-11) plus AGENT Pt. 5 Harold Camping and his July-5-Deniers suffered only their SECOND wrong end-of-days prediction the day before this was recorded. What AMATEURS! We’ve been having End-of-the-World parties annually on July 5 for 15 YEARS. Needless to say, we have a more mature perspective — for a bunch of professional MOCKERS. The show starts and ends with truly ancient (1980) SubGenius recordings (including our very FIRST TIME on any radio show), plus a little 1970 Firesign Theatre. Stang reads THE AGENT AND MR. DOBBS by Rev. Teeters LaVerge (Part 5 of 7) and then Lonesome Cowboy Dave calls in to join Stang and Wei in discussing false prophets, upcoming devivals, the general vanishing of Stang’s Texas accent, and other subjects of dire importance in the modern world. The rocker “Nature — I Hate It” by The Swingin’ Love Corpses climaxes the show 
“Cultwatch, an organization dedicated to helping people trapped in cults as well as warning about the dangers of cults before they get ensnared, has advice for Harold Camping’s followers.
“Their website states “If the rapture does not occur on this day, then we will all know for sure that Harold Camping and his followers have grossly misinterpreted the Bible.”
Guess the rapture ain’t so bad after all….
“A lot of people think the Rapture is coming May 21. It’s not. But assuming your pets are okay, here’s a prank we’d like you to pull. We call it Rapture Bombing.
“On May 21, get a bunch of your old clothes in full sets of pants, shirts, and shoes. Bonus points if you leave accessories like an old watch or sunglasses to go with them. Lay them out as if people have suddenly disappeared, leaving only the clothes behind. Be creative. Take pictures. Post them on our Facebook page, or tweet them with the hashtag #rapturebomb.”
